The Recap - The Balkans (Part II)

Corfu, Macedonia and Bulgaria. Definitely the laziest chunk of our trip and quite possibly the laziest few weeks of our lives. There appears to be a very strong inverse relationship between the strength of our tan and the number of things achieved during our days.

What We'll Miss

• The Ohrid fruit and veg market is quite comfortably the best fruit and veg market that we've come across in Europe. The stone fruits and berries in particular are the ones of your dreams
• Automatic coffee machines are on every corner in Bulgaria and given that I've forgotten what a good coffee actually tastes like, walking past and not popping in the equivalent 30c for a quick "espresso" would've just felt wrong
• Swimming everyday and losing a few kilograms was a nice change

What We Won't Miss 

• Chihuahuas. I've crunched the numbers and there are officially 1.2 chihuahuas to every 1 person in Bulgaria. You know when a cat walks proudly alongside you that you're not a real dog
• Bulgarian for thank you, phonetically, is blahgohdahryah. I asked a couple of Bulgarians how to pronounce it and both times after my butchered attempt they stared at me and said, "just say merci"
• Whinging, whining, little sooky children at the beach. Bring back those well behaved German kids!
• Average food. So much average food..
• I thought that Perth's roadworks were an eyesore and an inconvenience. That was before we went to Sofia. The city has essentially been divided in two and crossing to the other side of the main road which would've normally taken a minute now takes at least 30
• Seeing things on beaches that can never be unseen - old, saggy, brown, oiled boobs, kids pooing in the sand, way too many nude kids, semi-erect blokes in budgie smugglers - the list goes on

The Food

The gyros that we had in Corfu was an edible oasis in a desert of shit. It's definitely not a region to travel to for its culinary delights.

The worst of which was a slice of pizza that we had in Ohrid one night. The toppings were passable but the cheese that they'd used was some strange sort of spreadable cheese thing that was worthy of the odd gag. To top it all off it wasn't served on a serviette or a piece of cardboard but a massive square slice of wafer. What the actually f*ck.

The Drink

What's better than paying $2.20 for a 2L PET bottle of beer? Getting home to realise that you've paid $2.20 for a 2L PET that comes with a 20% bonus!! That kind of news was worthy of a beer.

Bye bye Balkans. Hellooooo Turkey!

Corfu all over you...

When we'd initially set off on this trip we'd always planned to spend a few weeks hopping between Greek islands, immersing ourselves in an as authentic Greek experience as possible. However our time in Europe is quickly running out and the bank account appears to be diminishing at an ever increasing rate. Our compromise was a week in Benitses on Corfu, a Greek island that's just a thirty minute ferry ride from the Albanian coast. We tried our best to have that authentic Greek experience. Our days went something like this.

Mornings began with us rolling out of bed when we felt like it for a breakfast of Greek yoghurt and honey, and some fresh fruit.

We'd then trek the tough two minutes down to the beach, pull up a sunbed and acquaint ourselves with one of the various cold coffees that the Greek people love so much. We are now very well versed on the differences between a frappe, a freddo espresso and a freddo cappuccino.

After a fairly strenuous four or five hours reading, gazing longingly at Albania, soaking up the sun and jumping into the cleanest and clearest sea we've swum in so far, we'd be feeling a bit peckish. Enter Greece's most beloved export - the mighty gyros.

We'd intended to be very methodical in researching Benitses' best gyros with a goal of trying all that Benitses had to offer before settling on our favourite. But after stumbling upon the particularly nondescript Kebab House and taking that first bite we knew that we'd found our winner. The meat was juicy and moist on the inside and browned exquisitely on the outside, some chopped tomatoes, cucumbers and onions were thrown in, as was handful of chips and then the additions that took the gyros from good to great - the condiments. Firstly, a Tzatziki chock full of so much garlicky goodness that you would immediately feel yourself sweating cloves as the garlic's fire raged around your mouth, and then there was the special sauce. Among other ingredients that we can't remember were oregano, lemon juice, olive oil and some type of mustard. This is special sauce that is truly special. The heavenly combination was all wrapped in a pita like none other that we've had before.

I know everyone at home has their go-to gyros joint and anyone who's been to Greece thinks that they've had great gyros but this is next level stuff. This particular gyros cannot be improved upon. Greece's gift to the world is gyros. The world's gift to us is that gyros.

After that gastronomical delight we'd wander back to our apartment for our daily Ouzo dose and our take on Greek meze - generally some onions and toms drowned in olive oil with olives and some Tzatziki and Taramasalata.

The nights normally ended with too much red wine, another penalty shoot out and another late night.

We also squeezed into that busy schedule a sampling of the Greek classics moussaka, stifado (an oily beef stew with shallots), sofrito (slivers of beef cooked in wine) and Retsina (resinated Greek wine),

souvlaki, Metaxa (Greek brandy), dolmades and baked feta. All delish!

Did we have the experience that we'd hoped for? Probably not. Any authenticity that this small fishing port once had is mostly gone (as evidenced by the English language chalkboards out the front of every single bar and restaurant) and we were probably twenty years late in getting there. Although upon reflecting on the above, I suppose we did a reasonable job. We can't complain too much......